A Difficult Bump in the Road: Coping with the Loss of a Loved One

Written by Cassie Licari & Dominique Houle on 09/06/10

Photo by Dominique Houle

Sometimes the people we love and care about are taken away from us. They may pass away from an ongoing battle with cancer, or may die unexpectedly in a car accident. Regardless, this is one of the most difficult things go through in life. You may feel like your whole world is closing in, and the emotions you have can feel overwhelming. When this happens, you are experiencing grief and are mourning the loss of a person you hold close to your heart. But there are ways to cope with a difficult time like this, and to eventually come out of it with a positive mindset.

Grief is when our body and our mind have an emotional and physical response to death or the loss of a loved one. Sometimes people feel very strong emotions, have trouble doing daily tasks, have problems sleeping or eating, and/or experience difficulty concentrating and studying. The way in which the loved one died (whether suddenly or expectedly) influences the way grief is experienced (TeensHealth). Typically, individuals whose loved one has died unexpectedly are at an increased risk of depression and posttraumatic stress disorder, among other psychological and physical effects.

It is very important to grieve after someone has died; it is a natural human reaction to the death of someone we care about. Everyone who experiences loss has their own way of dealing with it. Some people may surround themselves with friends and family, while others may want to be alone. Some may deal in a negative way, by drinking alcohol or using drugs, while some engage in positive activities like volunteering or charity work (TeensHealth).

Click here for information on how to properly care for yourself while dealing with the death of a loved one. Also, check out this website for healthy ways to cope with it. You can also speak to a therapist, school counselor or trusted adult. They will be more than willing to listen and help you deal during this difficult time.

You will never forget a loved one who has passed away. With time you will be able heal, and each day will be a little easier than the last. It may be hard to see it right now, but one day you will look back on the memories you’ve shared with them and no longer feel sadness; you will be able to smile.

For a real-life account of a youth who dealt with grief, check out Molly’s Story. A member of DEAL.org also had the opportunity to speak with someone who dealt with the sudden loss their parents when they were young. To read about Oliver’s inspirational story (en français), click here.

Links

TeensHealth
TeensHealth – Dealing with the death of a pet
MedicineNet
Helpguide
Kids Help Phone