The Presentation
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Slide 1: DEAL.org talks about bullying
Slide 2: Bullying stories
To begin, we are going to take a look at some very serious cases of bullying.
Slide 3: Reena Virk
(As reported by CBC News, 2008)
- She was a resident of Saanich, British Columbia
- She was 14 when she was swarmed and beaten by a group of peers (7 females and 1 male)
- Reena was able to stagger off, but one of the girls and the boy returned.
- They continued the beating and drowned her in a waterway.
- Her body was found eight days later.
- The six teenage girls were convicted of assault causing bodily harm. The boy and girl who returned were charged with second degree murder. He was sentenced to life in prison, with no chance of parole for seven years and after several appeals, she received a life sentence. The accused were all between the ages of 14 and 17 at the time of the crime. (CBC, 2009)
- Could this tragedy have been prevented? What can be done to help prevent situations such as this in the future?
Slide 4: Dawn-Marie Wesley
(As reported by CBC, 2002)
- She was a 14 year old resident of Mission, B.C.
- A breakdown in a group of friends led to one girl bullying and encouraging other teenaged girls to join in the taunting and verbal torture of Dawn-Marie Wesley.
- This taunting escalated and one of the girls beat Dawn Marie. Another girl admitted calling Dawn Marie and saying, “You’re dead.”
- After one particular threatening phone call from the girls Wesley wrote a suicide note saying she had been threatened by bullies and that death was her only escape.
- Shortly after she took her own life.
- One of the girls was charged with uttering threats and criminal harassment, while two others were charged with uttering threats (one was acquitted while the other is still awaiting trial) (CBC, 2002).
- As bystanders, what could the other girls from the group done in this situation?
Slide 5: David Knight
(As reported by CBC, 2002)
- David Knight’s life at school was hell.
- He had no idea why he was teased, taunted and physically hurt for years.
- The humiliation became unbearable when someone set up an abusive website about him.
- The website posted vulgar, sexual comments and hurt David’s reputation. He also received nasty emails with similar messages.
- In David’s case the bullying escalated from 30 people in the cafeteria saying something about him, to being posted online for 6 billion people to see.
- Feeling trapped, David left school to finish his last year of studies at home.
- Seven months later, David and his family finally got the hurtful website taken off the internet (CBC, 2002).
- Why may some people be more likely to bully online rather than in person? What can you do if you find offensive or hurtful things online?
Slide 6: Hazing incident: Charlottetown, P.E.I
What is hazing?
Hazing is an intentional or reckless act committed by a person or group against another person, in which the act is committed in connection to an initiation into or affiliation with a membership in any organization (sports team, club, etc…).
Why is hazing wrong?
Hazing is wrong because the individuals involved are at risk of potential physical injury, mental harm or personal degradation.
The biggest problem when it comes to hazing is getting players to tell someone about the incidents. Often they go unreported because the individual(s) are so eager to fit in and be accepted with those around them.
Here is an example of a hazing incident in P.E.I:
(As reported by CBC)
- In November 2008, reports emerged of a hazing incident by a Yukon boys soccer team while in P.E.I for their national tournament.
- Some players were tied up with athletic tape, wrapped in plastic wrap and had obscenities written on them.
- Sports associations have taken the step to create harassment policies and penalties to be faced by athletes who engage in such activities (CBC, 2008).
Slide 7: Hazing incident: Halifax
As reported by the Halifax Herald:
- A Halifax high school hazing ritual left several students with cuts and bruises and another with a broken wrist when older students beat them with oars and paddles and smeared them with food.
- Over the years several paddles have been found in the school.
- Investigations by the school and the police occurred as a result of the reported paddling.
- Assault is wrong under any circumstances. Calling beatings “hazing” or “initiations” does not make these acts legal in the eyes of the law
Slide 8: How would you define bullying?
Ask the question to the group – let the students answer the question, then provide them with the definition below.
Slide 9: Forms of bullying
Bullying can come in many forms: physical, verbal, social and cyberbullying.
Slide 10: #1
Slide 11: Physical aggression
Reena went through the first form of bullying: physical aggression, which is using your body or objects to cause harm.
Slide 12: Do you have any examples of physical aggression?
Examples: Pushing/shoving, tripping, kicking, punching, spitting, hitting/slapping, damaging property or possessions, stealing, being locked in closed or confined spaces, threatening with a weapon, physical acts that are humiliating, such as “wedgies,” hazing.
Slide 13: #2
Slide 14: Verbal Aggression
Dawn-Marie went through the second form of bullying: verbal aggression, which is speaking to or about a person in a way that is unkind, threatening or hurtful.
Slide 15: Do you have examples of verbal aggression?
Examples: Name-calling, mocking, teasing about personal appearance or possessions, gossiping or embarrassing another person, intimidating telephone calls, racist, sexist, homophobic comments, verbal threats against property or bodily harm, extortion: having to give-up money or personal belongings to avoid being hurt.
Slide 16: #3
Slide 17: Cyberbullying
David went through the third and forth forms of bullying: social alienation, which is to exclude or embarrass another person) and cyberbullying, which is using technology (such as a computer or cell phone) to hurt someone.
Slide 18: Do you have examples of social alienation or cyberbullying?
Examples of social alienation: Spreading rumors, publicly humiliating, gossiping, social rejection, threat of exclusion from peer group, isolation, setting up to look foolish, ethnic slurs.
Examples of cyberbullying: sending mean or threatening emails or text/instant messages, posting embarrassing photos online, creating websites to make fun of others or pretending you are someone else by using their name.
Slide 19: How is bullying a problem in your school?
Slide 20: Dawn Marie Wesley
“If I try to get help, it will get worse. They are always looking for a new person to beat up, and they are the toughest girls. If I ratted, they would get suspended and there would be no stopping them. I love you all so much.”
Slide 21: How do you think someone who has been or is bullied might feel?
Here are a few emotions one who has been bullied may feel:
- Angry
- Scared
- Ashamed
- Lonely
- Insecure
Slide 22: If you were being bullied, would you tell someone? If not, why not? If so, who would you tell?
Some do not tell others that they are being bullied out of fear of retaliation, of losing friends (being the snitch) and/or of having the bully retaliate against them.
No one should have to tolerate being bullied, so if you are being bullied, you can tell an adult you trust (teacher, principal, school counselor etc.), a trusted family member or a friend who can tell an authority figure for you.
Slide 23: Why do you think people bully other people?
People bully for a variety of reasons:
- They may be unhappy and take their unhappiness out on others
- They have have been bullied themselves
- It makes them feel superior to others, or in control
- To get attention or feel tough
- They think it will make them popular
- They may be jealous of the people they are bullying
- Some may not even realize that they are bullies.
- The truth of the matter is that bullies typically have self-esteem issues, may fear getting picked on themselves and/or have difficulties expressing negative emotions or dealing with issues in their own life. Bullying is a learned behaviour and can be eliminated (DEAL.org, 2009).
Slide 24: Myles Neuts – Giving a bully and audience only convinces them to continue to bully. Bystanders increase the victim’s humiliation.
(As reported by CBC News):
Myles Neuts was a popular grade 5 student who loved school. He had never really been bullied before, and he was a great kid. But one afternoon two older boys decided to hang Myles by his collar and necklace onto a hook in the bathroom. As Myles struggled to get himself off and was choking, the bullies actually invited other youth to come in to the room and have a laugh at the kid struggling on the coat hook. It was one of these witnesses that finally alerted the school staff. It was too late. While the perpetrators in this case had no idea they would kill Myles with their actions, they did take pleasure in his pain (CBC, 2005).
Often all it takes is for one person to step in and say something to end bullying. Giving a bully an audience only convinces them to continue bullying. Bystanders also reinforce the victim’s humiliation.
Slide 25: When someone is being bullied, why don’t people intervene or get involved?
Here are a few reasons why people do not get involved when someone is being bullied:
- Fear of being the snitch
- Fear of losing friends
- Fear of revenge from the bully
- Others might be afraid that their names will be mentioned
- Bullies and those who are being bullied need help, and it is important that you tell an adult who can do something to help those involved or the bullying behaviour will continue to happen. We run the risk of the behaviour escalating into situations such as those mentioned previously in the presentation.
- By standing around, watching and not doing anything, observers allow bullies to continue their behavior (DEAL.org, 2009).
Slide 26: When someone is being bullied, how can you help that person?
You can help by:
- Tell the bully (bullies) to stop.
Befriending a victim (eating lunch with them, walking with them, including them in other group activities, etc.) - Talk to them and offer to go with them to talk to someone about what they experienced. A little support can go a long way!
- If you do nothing, you are contributing to the cycle of violence that is bullying.
- It is everyone’s responsibility to improve their school environment. Be proactive. Get involved (DEAL.org, 2009).
Slide 27: What can you do to get help if you are being bullied?
Here are a few ways that victims of bullying can help themselves.
- Tell an adult you trust (teacher, principal, school counsellor…).
- Tell a trusted family member
- If an adult doesn’t listen, try telling someone else. Keep trying until you are taken seriously.
- If you are afraid of telling an authority, ask someone you trust to do it for you.
- If you don’t know the bully, you can try looking them up in a yearbook or on the internet.
- If you find it too hard to talk about the incidents, you can write down details in a journal (dates, times, exact events, witnesses, people you’ve told and how you felt). You can then give this information to a friend or trusted adult, who can help you along in the process of getting the information to someone who can stop the bullying (DEAL.org, 2009).
Slide 28: What can you do to get help if you are a bully?
Realize that your actions affect and hurt others. Your actions can also land you in trouble with your parents, your school and even the law.
Ask yourself why you bully. What is it you are hoping to accomplish? And can it be accomplished in a more positive way?
If other issues are bothering you, talk to someone about it. Tell someone how you are feeling (angry/hurt/upset) and possible reasons why you are feeling that way. People you can tell include:
- A parent
- A teacher
- A friend
- Call Kids Help Phone – 1 (800) 668-6868
Slide 29: What is being done to prevent bullying in Canada?
Bullying is taken very seriously. No one should have to go through it. Here are a few Canadian anti-bullying initiatives:
- Bullying is starting to be monitored by the court system. More bullies are being charged and tried in court for their actions.
- Edmonton police can now ticket bullies under a new bylaw prohibiting anyone under the age of 18 from bullying in a public place. Bullies can be fined as much as $250. Other cities are taking an interest in Edmonton’s course of action (CBC, 2003).
- Even forms of cyberbullying can be considered criminal acts.
- Bullying is not a joke or a game. In the eyes of the law, bullying is a crime.
Slide 30: What is being done to prevent bullying in your school?
You are all responsible for helping to create an environment in your school where bullying is not acceptable. Don’t let bullying take over your school. Take a stand, leave your mark. Talk to teachers or your principal about the issue of bullying and discuss what actions your school is taking to prevent and deal with bullying (DEAL.org, 2009).
Slide 31: Visit www.deal.org to find out how you can get involved in your school and community!
For more ideas on how to help eliminate bullying from your school and community, visit the bullying factsheet on DEAL.org!